私想空间

long time no write something here...i have happy, unhappy this few month. This few month i not really happy. i will leave the company soon ...and May i will go in to my next journey(new job), but i don't know how long i can stand it.... i have no confidence all the time now..from small till now... i never do a thing will full confidence, because of my family ?because my education ? i really hate myself in this... why people can 100% confidence ...how come i only have so little ? why ?? everyone resign also hope can get more salary high position ..i don know how i think... this time i leave n get a salary less than now... haha.. can't believe ? haha..myself also can't believe it... but is a good time for me learn, but can learn how much i really don know... not long in the future i think i will leave design this line...why ? haha.. because i don't think i doing design now... want be a designer is not so easy ..1st thing of the designer i think is confidence .. this few year i totally understand dream just a dream .. that time why i choose design course because i have a dream, but now money tell me everything, the confidence people tell me everything.. i tell myself now i not a designer just a machine, every one tell me how to design .. sometime after their word i will feel like, why i need to waste time to go college ?just come out and work let your boss or "designer" to teach you. i really lost .... now i really don't know what i want now... wait n waste my life ? ? ?